Tuesday, April 03, 2007

the first annual "who would I rather be tag-teamed by" tournament

The first annual"Who Would I Rather be Tag-Teamed by" tournament.

20 teams comprised of two individuals each will face off in a round-robin formatted tournament. The winning team will advance to the 2nd round, the losing team will not.

Round 1; Match 1

Who would I rather be tag-teamed by:


and


vs

and



At the expense of my internal organs being impaled by huge African penis, I hafta go with the Hoya Destroya (the sweatiest motherfucker in the world) Patrick Ewing and his partner Dikembe Motumbo, the man with the craziest coke nostrils I've ever seen.

I couldn't think of a worse lay than Nicole Ritchie and Paris Hilton. Paris' sex tape was a joke. I got harder watching Wolf Blitzer on CNN than by watching Paris fumble in the dark trying to figure out what to do with that fag's penis.

Another reason why I picked Dikembe and Patrick was because if I ever survived that crazy African gangbang, we could play a nice little game of pick-up ball afterward.

14 comments:

Ghetto Photo Girl said...

Ooh, I like this game! I'd pick the huge basketball players, and not only because Patrick Ewing was one of my favorite players ever. But because I've never had a threesome with two guys, and what better way to experience it than which gianormous baller cock?

Your Girl Friday said...

If you ever made it out alive, I'd shake your hand for that.

I would be too scared, I'm too little!

nobich said...

I would also pick the big black men cause who wouldn't want a good game of pick up ball afterward???

lastlifeinmyuniverse said...

paris hilton looks cockeyed there.

Me said...

Wonderful choice!

The Boob Lady said...

More like you'd be picking up your own balls.

Melissa said...

It's ok to admit you like big, black cock... lots of us do.

moondog said...

i'm having a hard time with this one. i'm not gay, so i'm not at all attracted to ewing and mutumbo. plus whenever i hear his name i can't help but think of some announcer yelling out "rejected by mutumbo!!"

even though they're both super skanky and i'd probably put on a whole box of condoms before i would even consider putting my dick down there, i'm gonna have to go with the ladies. at least nicole richie has a pretty cool personality. and i could always steal something of paris' and auction it on ebay...

2 Dollar Productions said...

The NCAA tournament must have brought back memories of Ewing & Dikembe, but you would get your ass handed to you - again - if you were even able to pick up a basketball after that experience.

Elaine said...

I'm with ya.
Sure Pat and Dickem would rip me to shreds but imagine the mutant crabs that you would get from Paris? And Nicole Ritchie? Isn't having sex with dead people illegal?

Ja7 L7+ said...

I think there'd be less herpes with the ballers. And I heard that Nicole has track marks around her snizz.

Thanks for adding me to the roll.

Freak Magnet said...

I'd fucking crawl in a hole and pray to die. I couldn't do any of them.

Charlie Shame said...

Dike and his 9 inch finger of shame, could emulsify any manhood you pretend to have, though so too could the Simple Twins with their dead stares and sulphuric salivary secretions.

Looking foreword to next week's Tango & Cash vs. Turner & Hooch thrilla.

Girl Behind You said...

That is the exact same reason I picked the 2 Basketball guys!!!!!!