Wednesday, September 24, 2008

Afterhours in the store

Alright. So Georgey was in the bathroom firing off a frothy one to the pictorial of Meagan Fox in this month's Maxim magazine, Davey-boy was busy dropping his balls on the mouthpiece of the cosmeticians' telephone and I, having done both already, was thinking about all the different ways the new Conservative's tax was gonna fuck up my Income Trust investments. The store was closed, so it was a good place to think... or to jack yourself a soda, or to booby trap telephones.

I find myself "working" alot more than I had originally intended. It appears as though some fulltime motherfucker had a crate of homo milk fall on his head. Work asked me to pick up some of the extra hours and, reluctantly, I agreed.

Work(on the phone): Hootch, did I wake you?

Hootch: Yeah. I was in the middle of my favorite dream where me and Dana Perino run away and become Menonites.

Work: Oh. Sorry 'bout that.

Hootch. It was just getting to the best part, too. The part where she uses my dick to churn the butter, then she cleans me off by..

Work: (interrupting): Okay, okay I get the picture. Listen, we've had an accident here and we need you to pick up some extra hours.

Hootch: Like how many extra hours?

Work: Like, 40 hours a week. We want you to work a fulltime regular shift. You know, like most grown men do.

Hootch: Dude, you're gonna, like, totally fuck up my daytrading.

Work: What daytrading? You just told me you were in the middle of a dream where US Press Secretary blows you.

Hootch: Hey, its what I do to prepare, okay. It helps take the edge off.

Anyway, in the end I agreed to pick up a few more hours in the evening. Its not as bad as I thought it'd be. I initially thought the fact that I have a University degree would fuck with my ego. I didn't thinkI'd be able to deal with working every day (even if it is only 4 to 5 hours a shift) making $9 an hour. Yeah, I have a university degree. Masters in basketweaving, motherfuckers. Almost as useless as a degree in philosophy.

Alright, lastly a review of my stock picks from last week:

(1) Potash. bought last week at 164.50; trading now at 173.24.
(2) Teck Comminco. Bought last week at 33.90; now trading at $35.00
(3) Pengrowth Energy Trust. Bought last week at 16.25; now trading at 17.26
(4) BCE. bought last week at 33.75; now trading at 37.10
(5) Yellow Pages Income Trust. bought last week at 9.00; now trading at 9.70

I'm going to add two more to the list.

Fording Coal Income Trust. I actually bought this last thursday, at a lower price but we'll say I picked it up today. Its trading now at $79. Its been bought out by Teck Comminco for $82 a share plus 0.245 a Teck Comminco share for every fording share you have. Because of the mess with the US banks there are now questions if the financing is actually in place to complete the deal. I say it is. If the deal goes through, Fording shares will be worth between 88-92 a share in less than a month.

Agrium at 81.50. Just a badass company that's scheduled to make more than $10 a share next year. It could go lower but over the long term there is very little doubt this bitch is going higher.



Franki said...

but not quite as useless as a degree in printmaking.

oh, so sad to win.

lastlifeinmyuniverse said...

i'll have what she's havin'.

Melissa said...

Welcome back, whistle britches.

2 Dollar Productions said...

If you're still day trading then you've got balls of steel as things are ugly out there.

But don't let them drag you into a real work week as once you break, you'll never go back and that's no good at all.

IDigHootchAndCootch said...

franki - dont worry, printmaking is gonna be the next hot industry, like computer engineering was in the mid 80s.

lastlife - coming right up.

Melissa - I missed being called "whistle britches"

$2 - day trading is alot easier than holding on to all your positions watching them get completely fucked over. day traders and shorts are the only ones making money now.

thankfully, next week I'm back to my customary 10 hours a week

Yo Momma said...

Seriously Megan Fox on Maxim. WHOA.

I'm glad that even though the stocks are taking a crapper, you're still out there makin' some money!

Freak Magnet said...

All that talk about the store had me missing my days at F&M. Until you got to the $9 an hour and working every day. That part always sucks ass.